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May 28, 2013, 07:33 PM
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Member Since: Mar 2013
Location: USA
Posts: 1,486
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Maybe try and keep in mind that although you're feeling things intensely, many of these emotions may well be 'normal,' however uncomfortable. And keep in mind that most (certainly not all) people with bipolar do not cycle from day to day, so the mood changes you're feeling within a given day and from one to the next, may well have nothing to do with bipolar.
People with bipolar disorder go through the entire spectrum of emotions just like everyone else dose, quite apart from 'episodes.' We all get anxious sometimes (some more than others), get really happy sometimes, sad, angry, productive, sluggish, etc., etc. All of this needs to be 'coped' with (or celebrated, if it's good!) -I'm not saying it's easy, but it might help to think of your day to day experiences as part of the ebb and flow of your emotions, of who you are at the moment, and every change in mood does not constitute an emergency.
I agree with your stepmom insofar as worrying so much about changes in mood can make you worse -thinking you're going through an episode could in fact exacerbate your symptoms (potentially) and certainly add a great deal of anxiety on top of everything else you're experiencing.
It takes time, and is not easy, to identify your emotions relatively accurately and figure out where they're coming from. Baby steps. I think therapy could really help with this. I think you're in therapy? Maybe you could ask your therapist to help you with identifying emotions, help you to understand and cope with the bipolar disorder and how to distinguish episodes from other issues. I would think he/she would be happy to help you, that's what they're there for.
I think you will get better --partly a matter of time, I think, and partly working on things in therapy 
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