it's hard. sometimes I get confused about who's feelings are who's. my others mix in with we and I will have all kinds of feelings and I don't know what to say to my therapist. do I tell her some? none? all?

as far as advise goes? Go slow. and don't push. like they say "go fast slowly." you'll get farther faster if you go slow and steady, than if you go beyond your limits and then have to deal what happens then.
I learned this the hard way. I had serious nose dives into deep dark depressions, with Su, SI, episodes too. avoid this kind of thing if you can. because they suck.