My whole life has been sink or swim.
some of you may be aware of the sink or swim test, if not you can google it.
It's a test designed to measure endurance and resilience where rats were placed in glass jars with water to see how long they could trade water. in the first stage of the experiment they succumb to exhaustion and drowned at various lengths of time in the water.
in the second stage of the experiment, new rats were taught resilience by way of rescuing them before they drowned and holding them in in the facilitators hands and allowing them to wriggle free.
if the rats ever became dormant in swimming they were shot in the head with a blast the water to motivate them.
Then came time for the sink or swim test. Most of the rats lasted 60 hours or more before exhaustion won and they drowned. None of the rats survived.

My point...very simple.

In life we are all doomed. We will all face death. Just like those rats.
The experiment had little to do with the rats. The experiment had more to do with the facilitators who seeing the rats were doomed to a prolonged death, did nothing to offer a real rescue.

Each one of us has swam in glass jar as shame was imposed on us by another and some of us are still swimming in those jars that people love to put us in.
We are either putting people in glass jars or we are rescuing people from them.
My therapist loves to watch me swim.

Just keep swimming
Just keep swimming
just keep swimming swimming swimming
what do we do we swim( Dory) (Finding Nemo)

I am a rat swimming in my own tears.
The lights have been turned off. The door is locked and no one is coming back.
Here's where I think of the rats early on in the experiment.
What is better a rat that drowns after 15 minutes or one that drowns after 60 hours?

Just keep us swimming.

I have an idea...why not destroy the ****ing jars.

Destroy the jars and you'll destroy the desire to just give up.