I had a miscarriage - it happened on the day that my brother and his wife proudly announced to me that they were expecting a baby - I never told them as I sat there, that I was losing mine. Like you, it was early pregnancy - but I was so sad, I didn't want that life inside me to end. Maybe it is instinct - babies need us to keep them safe, so those intense feelings could be "just" hormones or that primitive response, designed to protect. I think for me there were other things too, that I had failed in some way, that I was not good enough. I also can relate to the relief - the thought of having a baby was exciting, but also scary all rolled up into one. Also sadness, that anticipation of having something so amazing, so special, that would grow inside me, that would be mine - that I could feel love for, feel proud of.

I am sorry you are experiencing this right now - I am sure feelings associated with this are so personal and individual. Do know that there are people on here who care.

Soup