Thank you so much for replying, both of you. I really hurt because of this whole issue and desperately want to reconcile my feelings.
My wife has indeed stopped selling to him when I originally told her how I felt, about a month and a half ago when this was going on. She stopped communicating with him, but what really hurts me the most is I never, ever, felt that she was truly sorry. She has never told me as such. I think, deep down, maybe she is a little sorry, just a little bit, but it really disturbs me that she is too proud to show it and to attempt to reconnect with me. It tells me she doesn't know what a real relationship is. She has traditionally had an issue with ever finding fault within herself. Quite the opposite of me, I am so critical of myself a lot of the time.
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Originally Posted by avlady
Your situation is one I have never heard about, i don't know why anybody hasn't written back yet although. Your wife certainly is the bad guy here, people just don't do that kind of stuff. I would have her stop, i mean tell her you'll leave her if she doesn't stop, it's not fair. You are her husband, and wives just don't act like that. Maybe you can forgive her also if she stops, if that is an option for you if you're willing to forgive her, she does need forgiveness. I really am flabergasted about this issue, maybe I'm just stupid, but i have never even heard of anyone doing such a thing like selling breastmilk before. Wish you luck!!
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This isn't one of those things that are unforgivable, I know that I can forgive her, eventually. But I definitely cannot forgive her while there is such unrest with my feelings and me feeling so hurt, and her not sincerely showing me that she is sorry and desiring forgiveness.
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Originally Posted by jadzea
I don't know if I can say much to help but I am sorry your wife is putting you in this situation. If I may say so, I find it a little distressing that she is selling her milk to a single man with no children. There are so many babies in NICU's that really need the milk. She could certainly find a more appropriate outlet for her excess. How did she meet this man?
She is definitely feeding (no pun intended) into the buyers sexual fantasies. My office mate had 2 very premature babies and she nursed them for over a year. She used to sit at her desk and pump her milk several times during the day. There was nothing sexy or attractive about the process.
You have a right to feel betrayed. Your wife and this man are being much too intimate. I don't know what you can say or do but she needs to stop dealing with him and get on with being a wife and mother.
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To her credit, she is also selling to a mother who adopted a young child who has health issues and who has been doing marvelously since being on my wife's milk. My wife is a good person, but I am worried that she just doesn't understand boundaries, emotional connection, and how real marriage relationships are supposed to be.
Both her customers contacted her through an ad she placed on the internet. An ad she placed before letting me know that she was intending on selling her breastmilk.