Hi and welcome

Your story sounds much like mine. I had the same angry feelings and lost interesting almost everything. I also have a great family - lovely partner and brilliant kids but I was disconnected to them. I worked hard all the time but it was getting me down too. I teach and I was finding that the kids and other staff were bothering me all the time. That's not me.

In feb I caught a bad flu and was forced to bed for 2 weeks. I'm rarely ill so this was the first time in a long time that I sat still for any length of time. When I wasn't recovering I went to my doc who suggested that there were maybe some other things going on and it took till the next visit for me to really hear what she said. I was depressed. Majorly. And had been for some time.

I've been off work ever since and am trying out various treatments. It's taking a while but I'm starting to see a glimmer of hope that I'll get there. I've also started taking to my family. I mean about feelings and stuff. I'm not good at that so it's baby steps but it feels good when I manage a little.

Anyway what I'm trying to say is that my doc suggested that my flu probably did me a favour. It forced me to take time off and I'm now dealing with underlying issues. Can you take time out? If not completely then can you block off some time each day/week and devote it to examining what might be your underlying feelings? Can you talk to your wife or a friend or family member? Can you face going to a doctor? I know it's daunting but if you want to be healthy then you should talk to someone. You sound like you are depressed and maybe you need treatment. There is lots of help available and while you might not like the idea of some of them there is bound to be something that can help.

Please feel free to message me if you want to chat. This forum has been a real benefit to me and I hope you get something out of it. Take care of yourself.

C