Quote:
Originally Posted by hamster-bamster
Actually, that is a very good point - she might not have remembered. Not everyone is prepared to be questioned about their sexual past in an interrogation-style fashion and not everybody is necessarily up to date on their sexual resumes 24/7, just as my professional resume has not been updated since last year and my LinkedIn list of skills and expertise areas is not up to date and I would need to give some thought to updating it because I do not remember everything I have ever done professionally, and I especially do not remember one-off assignments.
It she had one threesome rather than a steady stream of threesomes, then it was like a one-off assignment rather than a core area of expertise that defines the professional experience in a meaningful way, and it would be easy to forget.
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I appreciate the responses. It happened a month before we started dating. I doubt she forgot. She knew I would not approve of the behavior and for that reason she lied to me. I never asked again in the fourteen years of marriage because I believed her. She had forgotten my issues with that type of behavior and it slipped out as something that was matter of fact to her because we were texting with her best girlfriend and for the two of them this is an open topic that they have apparently discussed it before.
I will be fine with it eventually as I truly do love her. For me this is brand new, and the images of her pop in my head from time to time. Try watching TV and not hear about threesomes or a movie, or songs on the radio. Not to mention this happened at a location that I frequent and every time I go there I am reminded of this happening there. I will get past it.
As far as the past is the past and her past should not matter to me. I just don't agree. Never will. To me it is no different than someone lying about being a virgin. They may have only had sex once and wanted to pretend they did not but to the virgin they are marrying that one time is enough to not want to marry that person and all involved deserve the truthful information prior to walking down the aisle so they know they are marrying the person they want to be with.