Littleme, it took me two years into my current therapy to tell my T something really fundamental to any chance I have to heal (I think). It was another half a year to actually discuss it. I never told my previous T about it at all. Apparently didn't even hint enough at it that he had any clue. I think T's understand how difficult some things are to discuss, and how some memories or experiences get shoved so far away or down or whatever, that it's almost impossible to discuss them in our "unaltered" state and sometimes it takes lowered inhibitions to get the information out there. I did it by writing a story in the third person - as if it were happening to someone else. You did it with a drunk text. The point is, the information is finally out there and you can start dealing with it. In the long run, this is a good thing, I think. Hang in there.

No one dies of embarrassment, by the way. I was almost positive that I would several times, having to go back and face T after telling him agonizingly difficult things. I went, and it seems to be working out. I think I am much healthier than I used to be.