Eskie, I do not see any connection between morality and FMM. I just do not see how the technicality of the number of sexual partners at any given moment has anything to do with anything important - she clearly did not slit the throats of innocent infants.

My point of bringing the other thread into here was not to attack GG's "moral values" (no, I would never be able to appreciate how the number of partners has anything to do with "values" - for me "values" are something important, of the loving kindness type of thing, and do not hinge on technicalities, so there is no point in taking the thread astray for that sort of a discussion), but to bring his two threads together in the hope of shedding some light on the situation. The two threads are strikingly different, and, as I said, look as if written by two different individuals, or, at least, the same person but at different times of his life because we do feel and act differently as we move through life. Yet they were written at the same point in time.

One valid point of the current thread is that OP was clear on his expectations and the wife lied to him. So technically he is entitled to feel self-righteous in leaving her now, negating and disregarding 14 years of positive common history, because he was tricked into marrying her. It is probably not the wisest approach nor the most compassionate, but at least it is, technically speaking, valid.

GG did he talk about morality much - he talked about his idiosyncratic reaction to some very negative experience and his decision to seek a person who would match him in the level of (in)experience. The point of seeking commonality is valid and I understand the desire - speaking of lawyers, I did not hire a female lawyer who was decked out in a suit and wore lots of make-up and did hire a male lawyer who wears wrinkled shirts and whose jeans are not quite the right fit for him, because I seek commonality even in relationships with lawyers, and I am a messy, disorganized person myself so I am much more comfortable working with the guy in a wrinkled shirt than I would be working with a woman who applies wholesale quantities on make-up on a daily basis. So I can see how GG might have wanted commonality BEFORE the marriage. so BEFORE the marriage the point was valid. AFTER 14 years of marriage, he has a lot of facts on the wife about their commonality and the issue with the FMM should have no bearing any longer.

That leaves us with the issue of misrepresentation and nothing else.

The other thread, however, paints a completely different picture. The wife, as portrayed in the other thread, looks like a completely different person.

So that is all unusual.