Hi Hermit, xxhanna, Anna, Zuden, and everyone else who answered,

thank you. I don't find peace from natural things anymore. I used to love nature & hiking but it hasn't worked for me.

I have a regular sleep routine and usually sleep ok now with the help of Atavan. I sleep 6 - 7hrs a night. Very fortunate. I don't sleep during the day, never been able to, but I do stay in bed a lot.

I do all the daily things usually - showering, eating well again now, do some errands, occasional odd job.

But I feel really on the edge, so unable to cope & hopeless. Still. It's been an entire year. I don't have any belief that I'll make it thru. I haven't basically bec. I haven't improved. Hang on for what when you can't see any happiness or anything to look forward to? Best I can look forward to is being unconscious or finding a bit of comfort which only lasts a little while - from maybe staying in bed & reading. That's not enough reason to want to get up in the morning and go thru a day.

Sending hugs to everyone

Gracez