Hi LoveLoveS. At least you discovered the alcohol connection early! I somehow survived until now not knowing that was making things worse until now (late 30's). Good for you for being so self aware. I am currently reading a book called Mood Mapping, that was written by a person who is bipolar. It is helping me learn even more about myself and connect with cause/effect so I may have better control of my moods and behavior. That, coupled with the support of people who are living with BP here on PsychCentral, have been really helpful to me lately. Someone said this to me when I first joined and it was so comforting, so i will say it to you now; "i look forward to our mutual journey". I may add (in my own words) may we bring one another comfort, understanding, and support. Glad your here!