Citrine, you're not talking crap. You raise many valid points. Yes, she should do her fair share in keeping the house clean. But she won't and you can't make her. All you can do is control how you respond to her. If you don't want to feel upset by her actions, you don't have to. I know that's really hard to do. Detaching yourself from her emotionally will save your sanity. It take a lot practice. Hopefully someone can give you good advice on how to detach emotionally in your situation, because like Pfrog, I live alone and don't have to deal with that crap. I can see how the situation would stress you out, though.