Both parents, in their own way, seem to be having difficulty "letting go" as you become a young adult. If you feel you can, (I did this once when I was young and it worked well, don't know why I didn't do it more often) you might want to write a letter to dad about how you are feeling; another to mom (she sounds very attached)-----this can be useful because it gives the other person time to think before they react/respond---and they can talk to each other if they want to. Just an idea. In time, it will likely work out. You need to go where you need to go in life, it isn't easy sometimes when a kid grows up and begins to become truly separate from the parents...(it does sound like your dad has depressive symptoms...) You sound reasonable and caring, I think you will be fine----this is a time of major changes for all of you (even though it happens everyday everywhere...)