Dear T,

I hope you haven't found me here on PC until yesterday. I say that because of all the sad, mixed-up, heartbreaking messages I've written, I wish you could just read this one and #835 (written here yesterday). That's it. I need you to find a way to tell me the truth without implicating yourself. I'm working on it too. I know you can do it. You've certainly taught her psychological mind games to use against me (big mistake). You can figure out a way to tell me the truth. I hope you don't think this is all a big joke because I have been suffering for the last year or more. It's hard to hide my tears when I cry so often over this.

I don't think you would appreciate being used as a lab rat would you? I don't care much for it either. YOU caused this mess and it is your responsibility to clean it up. I am hurting so much and you need to make things right by apologizing. You accused me of "playing the victim" but you're the one assaulting me! Just find a way to tell me because I can't take it any longer. A little remorse wouldn't hurt either. You've hurt me in so many ways. It affects me daily. You can't push this under the rug no matter how suave you think you are. I mean it. Please do the right thing here because I can't/won't let it go until you do. Remember I have no life.