((haier)) - I'm very sorry for all you've been through and understand a lot of how you're feeling. In short my husband decided to marry another woman (religiously) while married to me and expected me to tolerate it. We were married 30 yrs when he decided to do this. This was 8 yrs ago and haven't been able to move out because of finances but I'm working on it. I've felt trapped in a loveless marriage.

Like you..... I felt devastated and very angry. Yours is complicated by another child. I don't blame you for not wanting to get back together - trust is shattered. Get some counseling for yourself and a good lawyer. Now he'll have to support 3 kids. Mine was my 1st love too and I empathize with your intense pain. The road of grief will be hard but you'll get through this. In the meantime take good care of yourself health wise so you can be strong for your kids. My kids give me the strength to go on and I wish you well in this difficult time.