Keep resisting. Most urges last only a short time. Not that they may not go off and on for some time, but the window of time when you could actually go through with it is relatively short. If you can make it through that part, it is a victory. The longer you go without cutting, the stronger you become, and the weaker the urges will become. I wish I could tell you that it happens overnight, but I'd be lying.

Look at it this way. When you give in and cut, how long does the relief last? How many negative feelings do you get based on the fact that you gave in? How long do the cuts and scars last? My guess is that there is more harm than relief in there.

If your husband knows that you cut, see if he will help. Even staying in the room for a while, or taking an object that you may fixate on. I've got almost four decades of scars. Do you really want that to be you? Yes, I have stopped, and it wasn't easy, but it is doable. Watch your triggers and don't be afraid to ask for help. SI is a symptom of anxiety and depression and or anger. Treat it like one. Don't be ashamed. You didn't choose this. It just happened to be the symptom you wound up with.

Sam2