I just had a conversation with my T about this yesterday!

A couple of months ago, I told her it made me feel really weird and jealous and upset whenever her next client got mentioned on the phone. That's because she works in a sort of group clinic, so the receptionist will phone during our session to alert her of the next client's arrival. She keeps the calls to a bare minimum of "Ok thanks, I'll pick him up downstairs in 10 minutes," but the personal pronoun is already too much for me! She was super nice about it and now doesn't mention their gender anymore on the phone, haha. This way, when I walk past 3 people in the waiting room on the way out, I can just fool myself that none of them are waiting for my T

Yesterday, though, her previous client's session went over the time limit a bit, so I saw how my T showed the other client to the door (it was a middle aged woman). They were laughing and joking, and the woman even came back to hand the mail to the receptionist! Gahhhh I felt horrible - I instantly started judging and comparing myself: that I would never dare pick up the mail, that I'm probably a way less fun client, way weirder, needier, more work, etc etc. That my T probably looks forward immensely to meeting with this woman, and then sighs and braces herself for every appointment with me...

I ended up bursting into tears as soon as our session started, and telling her all of this. She reacted in a lovely, caring way! Instead of picking one of us as the "more beloved" client, she told me it wasn't weird or sick at all to want to be your T's only (or most special) client. She said that almost every one of her clients had expressed similar feelings, and that many of them entertain similar illusions / hopes / fears about this issue.
Best of all, she said SHE had the same thing with her mentor and team supervisor! Like thinking (hoping) that if he said something to her, he would only mention it to her

So: it's not just us! Even our T's can feel this way....