Thank you SeptemberMorn.. I never really thought about that. I have kept asking God in my prayers to help me to do what is needed to join a CRC church. Rather than saying "I want to follow you, please help me to find a place to do that" - kinda rough prayer but I can work on that... Wow what a difference another prespective can make.
When I ask that ? of my friends and ministers - they say what does it matter - you can still worship God, you don't need to join a church. Which is true in my faith but I have still longed for baptism.

Thank you for offering a new path.