Hello MiniButterfly,
I think sometimes we need to try not to look too far ahead and just live in the moment, hour by hour rather than scaring ourselves with what might happen ahead.
I also think contacting T is a great idea, that's what they are there for, to help you in tough times. That's good self-care on your part in knowing you could do with a little more support right now.
Hugs
__________________
Pegasus
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“Everybody is a genius. But if you judge a fish by it's ability to climb a tree, it will live it's whole life believing that it is stupid.” - Albert Einstein