Hopefully the new T will help you understand why you do this, and understanding is a good step in changing. I do understand that we can get set in a pattern and it's hard to get out of it.

I've been in a similar situation for a short while. I've always been very comfortable in my own skin and company, but I had a short period of depression and found myself wanting to be with my fella all the time because it stopped me thinking about my own problems. Of course this isnt healthy and he was feeling suffocated and irritated with me and wanted to get away! I also found that the little things I didn't like about him that previously washed over me really annoyed me and I got a bit angry at times. At the time this was all his fault in my head, but in reality he was just the same person he always was, the one I loved, but I had changed with the depression.

I just had to work hard to understand my depression and then develop my own interests again, and remember the girl I once was before I'd got depressed and the happy, independent woman I was before I met him. I also changed my attitude - ie, when he was away with work, I enjoyed all the things he didn't - movies, not eating set meals, listening to all the music he hates - and I did not miss his snoring!! It really helped me appreciate time to myself again and I actually started to look forward to it. He's on holiday for two weeks with his pop soon, and although I will miss him terribly, I am looking forward to my own 'holiday' away from him and being selfish with my time!

I don't know the reason why you are depressed, but I do think that working on depression will help your marriage and day to day living a heck of a lot. And hopefully the black cloud will start to lift.

Good luck, and I'll be keeping my fingers crossed for you.

Hugs.