A very common behavior of bipolars is to quit the meds. Sometimes it's "I'm feeling good, I don't need this stuff", sometimes it's the side effects, sometimes you don't think you are really ill & sometimes you think you are being poisoned by all these meds & should go the "natural" route. Your doc should understand that quitting your meds is a symptom & a common one of bp. She shouldn't judge you harshly because you reacted like so many bp's do (myself included--questioned whether I really needed this stuff, whether I was really bipolar, but I had such horrendous depressions that I was afraid to go off & have them come back). Take care--Suzy