The idea of seeing a prostitute/callgirl would be so you get a little bit of experience and in your own mind, at least you know what sex feels like and you yourself know that you're not a virgin. It's a psychological barrier that's no longer there. Losing your virginity seems to be a big thing for you, but it also seems to be getting in the way of you getting a realationship with a woman because you're so fixated on that. Women can smell desperation, you'd be better off saving your money, get a high quality escort to teach you a few things. Don't get a street prostitute though. Get that out of the way. Then you can focus on looking for a women for something more.

If you think about it, so far going you way of doing things hasn't worked out. You're thinking of killing yourself over being a virgin so why not pay for sex and you won't be one no longer?