I am the same way. I have a history of abuse in the past. I do not kiss my H and we have been married for 18 years. Pecks on the lips are weird but doable. But anything more then that is simply impossible. It is very overwhelming. closeness, getting into one anothers personal space zone, feeling of inadequacy, fearful of where it will lead,

I have dissociation, I can push threw it only to have similar to panic type sensations. It brings out extreme fear. The taste sends me into PTSD mode. Beer, cigarettes, certain temperature of ones tongue, it is just to much.

We haven't kissed that way maybe 10 times in 18 years. It is just not a good thing. All I can suggest is T. Overcoming past abuse issues is difficult. I have a T that specializes in trauma's and it is helping and one day I hope to be "normal". Talk to your girl friend be open and see if there are similarities that you and her ex share. Taste, only when kissing leads to sex, was she forced to kiss or have kissed pushed upon her.

Good luck. I wish yall the best.