Debi, though I have severe treatment resistant bipolar and in a marriage that's going south, your situation is far worse and much more stressful. After my mom died from cancer, my dad, with whom I was living, said to me, "If you can't run on eight cylinders, run on four. If you can't run on six cylinders, run on three, but just keep moving forward." He was a World War II combat veteran that left him with psychiatric problems, so he understood. Do what you can and make every effort to try to keep a handle on it. Call on every resource available; friends, social workers, psychiatrist/psychologist, self help groups, prayer, if you're religious. You need to survive. Regarding Social Security, find a lawyer or go to Legal Aid to fight for your boyfriend. Don't let them get away with what they're doing. I know you're weary and disheartened, but if you quit, you lose everything you and your boyfriend have worked hard to gain.