I'm sorry about the situation that you've found yourself in. You're right, having a BPD dx does suck. Losing friends (my best man no longer talks to me), feeling anxious, not being able to sleep, all of the symptoms are terrible. I wish I had the words that would comfort you in some way, but I'm kinda going through a rough stretch at the moment and am having trouble seeing the forest for the trees. But I didn't want my own issues to stop me from showing that I care. Things are short for both of us at the moment, but I think you should be proud that you are working on the homework for your T. Don't minimize it. There were weeks after I was first diagnosed that I was unable to much of anything, unable to focus on anything. You're trying, and for those of us with this dx, that's an accomplishment in itself.