Aside from the bipolar mood swings, I've had a lot of problems with memory, memories of feeling persecuted by past classmates that I haven't thought of in 30 years, not wanting to connect with people from that period of my life. Does bipolar affect memory? Sometimes I just draw so many blanks. Sometimes I just want to leave the past behind. I don't know. I usually have just a few close friends at a time. It's always been that way for me.

Going through facebook, I see friends of friends that I have known and I want to reach out but fear I would be overwhelmed by people. I don't know.

I also see these people from my past with big fancy houses, beautiful familes, and lots of friends. It's at these times that I feel so inadequate, small yet so different from them.

If anyone can relate or send a message of support, let me know, because in this facet of my life, I feel so alone right now.