Grew up basically with parents who had normal eating habits. My father worked nights so my mother would always have dinner fixed for him before he left for work....& if I was home from school in time I would eat with them.....otherwise would end up with the left overs later in the evening.

Always remember my mother complaining about her weight......along with my grandmother. They were constantly saying how when they were younger they could eat so much food & never gained weight....then after my mother got married, it was nothing but gaining weight. My dad on the other hand could eat anything & never gain weight.

I do remember going out to eat with them at Bob's Big Boy....I always liked the chocolate shakes (really thick ice cream like soft serve)....but after trying to eat a whole hamburger I would eat as much of the shake as I could.....then my dad would get the rest...but he kept asking me if I wanted more of it....& I would take another bite...until I would end up feeling sick from eating too much.....I always hated that feeling.....there was no worse feeling for me than throwing up so I finally learned to stop eating before I started to feel sick.

Thinking back at my mother's & my grandmother's weight, I promised myself that I would let myself go after getting married like I thought my mother & grandmother did (not sure it was really the case with them or just seemed like it to me).

After I got married, I kept working out & exercising & even when I got pregnant, I only gained 10 pounds for a baby that weighed 8lbs 2 oz at birth.....so was back to my normal shape & weight almost immediately. After getting my degree & starting my career, I played racquettball every day at lunch rather than eating & was just into staying in shape & like with everything else....not wanting to be anything like my mother or my parents in any way.

I would eat when it was convenient & not eat when it got in the way of doing what I wanted. But during my growing up years, I always noticed that stress was the main reason I would stop eating....& it just kept getting worse as I grew older until the point where I lost my career that was my escape from my bad marriage.....then the anorexia set in.....to start with from all the stress I was going through that wasn't short term stress........that same issue still haunts me but now, I seem to have broken my ability to know when I'm hungry...sometimes it shows up, but most times it doesn't & not living alone after leaving my H....I only seem to eat one thing at a time...I make the meat for dinner & am too full to eat anything else....then later on will make the vegies....or whatever....but just don't know what it's like to sit down & eat a real meal......totally different from the life I grew up in.....but that's been the story of my life