After taking a xanax i calm down considerably. I hate taking them. I feel like its a sign of weakness and thanks to all of those that abuse benzos it makes those who REALLY need them hesitant to take them due to horror stories. I've never felt such intense feelings physically and mentally the past couple of days. I fear that I'm going to lose my job since it gives me the worst panic (I am a people pleaser and fear failure) I guess I'm going to take my xanax as needed till this either leaves my body or I get psychiatric help. I need to give myself credit for still getting my work done through this. Even though i feel weak and ashamed I'm still functioning.