Hi again Luminar,

I am having psychodynamic psychotherapy at the moment but it ends in a years time. He tends to concentrate on historical events and is Freudian in thought so a lot of it is about the lack of proper nurturing in my early childhood that is leading to the mood changes as well as issues around not being able to integrate good and bad experiences as well as referring to a reactive mood and unstable sense of self.

I asked him BP and he said that it was a wide spectrum of experience which he agreed I was on but he was trained to work on talking therapies rather than offering a diagnosis and prescribing medication. We did discuss being referred to one of his colleagues to discuss meds.

Initially he said he was not impressed with the BPD label but that seems to have changed recently by what he has been implying. I suppose I am harping on about the BP stuff because I am perhaps scared of facing up to it. Sounds ironic but I really want to be BPD because that seems to result in recovery and not having to rely on meds. The worst thing that could happen is that I finish the course of psychotherapy and find I am still not recovered and my mood changes affect my functioning.