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Originally Posted by middlepath
I deeply want friends but i moved across the country last year and have yet to make meaningful connections in my new area. People are so rushed and busy and I am awkward socially (at least i think so, or i feel that way).
I had friends back home but they seem to have fallen to the wayside since the move. I am so lonely. I am so sad. I don't know how to make friends at this point. I am 38 years old and friendless. I don't just want the type of friends that you go shopping with or to coffee...i could care less about those things. I want a friends that i connect with deeply, that can speak with me at a level that can explore the big questions in life. Someone I feel is there no matter what.
I just feel like a misfit in this world. I am surrounded by well-intentioned people who seem to just care about making money and whats for dinner. I am not like that and it pains me not to have a connection with other people that is meaningful.
Whats worse is I have behaved like such an erratic ***** in the past, some of my previous friends have distanced themselves and I don't see the possibility of repair.
What would you say to yourself if you were me? How do you go about finding people to connect with? What do you do about feeling so awkward?
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I've always found it difficult to make friends but here and there, I've connected with people and most of the friends I've made, though, no one is local, are still my friends. We talk on the phone or exchange e-mails. I'd like to say my wife is my friend but, she is what she is. The truest thing I can say is that we understand that we don't understand each other.
Though you have plenty of people to chat with on this site, you want someone face to face that you can hang out with or call. I'm a misfit, too, maybe with a touch of Asperger's because I really do enjoy my own company. I've been a ham radio operator since 1964 and day or night, I can fire up my rig and talk to people around the world. That said, it is great to have someone who understands you and completely accepts you. Maybe a bipolar support group. Right out of the gate, the playing field is level. From that point, it's a matter of meeting someone or several people with the right vibe. Feel free to pm me. I usually log on everyday. Since Thoreau was quoted, I believe he said, "I never found anyone as companionable as myself."