I apologize for such a belated response.

That is the question isn't it? On one hand, I have a life-time of experiencing gender dysphoria to back up the need to change, and on the other hand, I currently feel less than human which makes that kind of decision difficult because I don't really feel connected to myself, and therefore feel less depression and anxiety about gender (also socially isolating myself helps a lot). But there's evidence that the depersonalization, general depression and general anxiety is caused, at least in part, by the dysphoria. I have a strong disconnect from my name, from how people treat me, from my own body, from anything social, and also from constantly trying to go against every grain in me to be what everyone expects me to be. It just got to be too much. So yeah :/ this is why I feel so stuck right now. If any of that made any sense... basically I can't help but wonder if the very things (depersonalization, depression and anxiety) that make me second-guess changing myself, are the reasons I need to change myself. sorry if I'm rambling or if I'm being melodramatic.