The one thing that was instrumental in my recovery was Xanax. I know it gets a bad wrap but when I could not control the impulse or I was having a hard time the Xanax would wash away all the feelings and put a damper on the cycle of self abuse. It helped break the addiction of needing it and gave my brain a chance to heal so therapy can be more effective. I thought I would need it all the time but It helped me become stronger in fighting the urges and I actually needed it less over the months. I only use it maybe about once a week. See if you can talk to your primary care doctor. That is where I got it from. I never asked my therapist if it was o.k until after I got it and he was on board with it. He would just aske me every week how much I used and kept an eye out on misuse.