Another fact I should point out - I started in therapy when I was about 8 years old. I was held back in 3 rd grade, not because I couldn't do the work, but because I was emotionally immature.

I was misdiagnosed at age 15. So 7 years of therapy hadn't helped, of course it was all in the same practice. Mom took me to 2 different hospitals trying to get answers, and the closest she got was a doctor who advised her to read a book about moods.

But, this was around 1982 or 1983, so no one was really taking mental illness in kids seriously.

I think it was 13 years ago today I tried to kill myself, and ended up in the hospital. And that was the first time any therapist had asked me questions about bipolar symtoms. I didn't know the phrase "racing thoughts" so I didn't know how to describe it.

I also suffered in silence alot. I never told Mom about the bullying I endured, I never told her about what the therapist said, I didn't think anyone would believe me. And I had huge anxiety over being the center of attention or possibly humiliated so I suffered in silence and internalized a lot of stuff.

My other big fear was getting arrested, it kept some of my more violent impulses in check. Like I would get frustrated in stores and end up being verbally abusive to employees or storming out and really wanting to turn over displays or knock merchandise off shelves or break things but I never would.

Making a scene probably brougth negative attention on me, but I was in my "bipolar bubble" and I couldn't see how others viewed me. Sometimes I still have this problem, I can't look at myself with detachment, so I'll act certain ways that only later I'll realize are not appropriate or are problematic. But at the time I don't have that level of self awareness.

Things are different now between when I was a kid, the fact that professionals even recognize that kids can have mental health problems is a huge positive thing. If I were an 8 year old now therapy would be a lot different. (I hope). But I don't think therapy alone could have helped some of my symptoms like the anger, hypersexuality, depression, irritability, etc.