I got a glimmer of self compassion when I felt sorry for myself for having to put up with so much garbage from myself. By "felt sorry for myself" I don't mean in a self absorbed, whiny way, I just mean I noticed I was stuck under all this negativity and all these ugly self-problems. I felt sorry for the person getting in her own way and trying so hard to bring herself down. The mother isn't doing it now, we are doing it to ourselves? Poor us.