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Just wanted to let you know that I do indeed understand how you are feeling on this subject, for I have asked that same question many times over... (and) this is the only answer that I have been able to come with:

God uses all things (good & bad) for our good... and that all things happen for a reason, whether [rather] we realize it at the moment, or not.

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I agree 100% with what Rhap said above. Another thing that has helped me deal with my own abuse as an innocent child is the fact that my abusers were also given Free Will by God. It was THEY that chose to rape me, molest me and otherwise abuse me.

I have applied the Scripture that speaks of what Rhap said. Everything happens for a reason... or if we choose, we can use our experiences, with God's help and let Him turn them into good.

Someone help me with the Scripture passages, will you? My brain is misfiring big time tonight.