violence!

it hit me so hard today

I usually get a chance to let it go to express it...!

that chance has been taken away from me...

not because I don't experience it...

but because I have evolved!

I used to be quite dangerous.
those that loved me feared me.
those that hated me knew exactly why

they are beginning the endearment process again ...like they had automatically before I went bad.

being bad is very over-rated like a bad mood over-stated...easily done why make those that love you run?

I'm never fully recovered from this abysmal affliction of mood swings in the extreme BUT I'm in the pre-school for emotional delinquents!

like today for example I was a murderer in the traffic and then I imagined every other driver was ME!

...and did I want to MEET me...!...in a crapass! mood?...and I went further and incorporated the concept...

"oh CRAP I just cut myself off!"...

..."that was ME that just looked at me funny like THEY (me) got some other **** on their mind!"

..."I'M in my own freaking way at the fuKNG supermarket!!"...I want something more than I do!"

I will beat the SHT! out of myself if I crash into my own car with my car too!"

sounds nutso?...right?

but the point is ..(and I found this out by self disdain!)

MAYBE??...everybody is freaking struggling?

even the assssholes...and we are sorta' in a cool position in life...cos??

there is a good chance I know what you don't know what I am going through...and likewise...