I was thinking about the splitting of homes, a little more.

Usually both parties have to take a step down in their household expenses.

For myself, I had to find a place I could afford, and my exh ended up moving in with roommates. If the price of health insurance through his employer was so high(1K a month, ), he'd probably have his own place.

He now lives just two blocks away. He was just one town over, for a while, until this past April/May.

Sure, the wages of two can no longer be combined and financially speaking, on paper, it would seem like kids are 'deprived', but in my case, the splitting of wages was the better solution, in my opinion. (finances were part of the war between the two of us).

Can there be stability, yes. Sometimes, he just comes to my place, in the afternoons, after the kids get home from school. He has hours that are conducive to spending time with the kids from the time they get home to the time it's time for dinner/bed.

I really feel for the 'broken homes' where there is an absent parent involved. But when both parents are waging war with one another, in the home, there is no stability.

I, wouldn't change a thing, to how things ended up in my marriage. I gave it my all. Went to therapy, he didn't, wouldn't, couldn't(bring himself to do 'that').

The kids, their needs are met. Are there fancy vacations? No. Weren't any, in marriage, anyways....

If divorce is a decision, then I am sure it's something you've thought through all the details and have tried all you can.

You don't sound like you'd be a disappearing act. That, to me, is what a real honest to goodness broken home is.