Hi Sadeyes....So sorry you're hurting like this When you say that things will never get better makes me so sad, because I've certainly been in a similar place. I can only speak for myself, of course, but I try my best to remember that when I think things like that it's because the demon (depression) is controlling my thoughts ~feelings, and he does not care about anyone. Shame on him, because what he tells us is NOT the truth, no matter how much it may feel that way at times. From my own experience I will just say that I have felt that complete lack of hope....for quite a while...and now I am not as bad. Still struggling at times, but not where I was before, and am able to see glimmers of hope more often. I pray that some kind of relief comes for you as soon as possible... ~whimsy