Quote:
Originally Posted by leaJ
Would he be hiding YOUR child from someone else...running around telling people he doesn't want the kid???
I think a big part of this is also has to do with the child support issue...it is frustrating to feel like he is just a paycheck for his ex gf, and that takes away from what he will be able to provide for you and your future child. Maybe a therapist can help you work some of this out and get down to the real issues here...in the meantime, I would seriously reconsider any thoughts on having a child with him until you get it all worked out and have come to peace with all this. Hugs.
|
The child support is a HUGE issue for me. Granted, it would be a bigger issue if he didn't pay it. The problem I have with it lies in the fact that the kid's mom worked until the support got upped. Now she doesn't work and supports the same lifestyle as when she did. That's what I find irritating because I know it isn't all going to the kid. It is also an issue to me that when we have a kid, I will pretty much be sole support of it due to the amount he pays on the one he already has.
I don't want a child until I am married to avoid a messy situation like this. We have talked about marriage and he's asked me once, but I don't want to say yes until I know I can accept this part of him. As I've said before, I will leave if I can't, but I HAVE to know that I've tried. Creating this profile and posting on here is not to whine or be flamed for not viewing children as special, it's to get perspective from someone who has no ties to this situation, hear personal stories of people who have been in similar situations, and get advice. If this doesn't help, then I am going to therapy.
Thank you for your views. They were a big help.