Quote:
Originally Posted by ultramar
I'm wondering if she just recently moved in with this guy? I ask because maybe she's distracted and off her game, her life sounds rather tumultuous and having huge relationship issues at the moment she may be projecting relationship issues on to you (though of a different kind).[/SIZE][/FONT]
I don't know what to suggest except to continue to communicate with her that you are not feelings heard, and continue to look into the role you may play in the impasse where you find yourself now (if any). Keep exploring, keep talking to her, hopefully you can find your way through this, even if the relationship does end up changing somewhat (hopefully, ultimately not for the worse).  |
Yes, she did just move in with her new partner (a woman). She mentioned that her children are having to get used to the idea of their parents' divorce AND their mom's new female partner (who used to be "mom and dad's friend)." I think her life is very much in transition right now, and I think her distraction has less to do with me and more to do with her. She's also made comparisons before between me and her oldest daughter, and I think it's possible that the tension she's having with her daughter right now may be coming out between me and her in session (i.e. her own transference).
Yes, in my e-mail to her, I said that I felt frustrated and, as a result, I realized I was putting up a wall. It wasn't intentional, but I took responsibility for the fact that I was closed-off today. I said that I wasn't feeling heard and, instead of speaking up and insisting we address it, I just kind of closed off and was unproductive for the rest of the session.
Honestly, writing the e-mail to her and explaining how I felt has made me feel a lot better. A lot of my frustration was coming from the fact that she kept cutting me off in session, and left me unable to really express what was bothering me. I was upset that she wasn't willing to go there and really address it. Writing the e-mail allowed me to tell her how I felt without interruption, and get it all out in the open. She probably won't respond until session next week, but it's not the response that I'm really interested in. The most important part was just letting her know how I felt and why.