I remember one thanksgiving, it was the first one at a particular church and the deacons waited til my then spouse was gone from the house...and they brought me a live turkey (they were turkey farmers) and asked if I'd like to have it for Thanksgiving dinner.

Sure. They ahem did'em in right there and gave him to me, walking about smirking. I went about dressing it out

I was the first lady they had done that to over all the years, that actually knew what to do and didn't flinch! LOL