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Jun 18, 2013, 11:03 AM
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Member Since: Jun 2013
Posts: 18
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I am so sorry for your loss honeybee 
My grandmother committed suicide long before I was born and left a family of 5 children ages 8-5months old. It's very difficult to understand but know that your father was most likely suffering from a mental disease that he wasn't equipped to handle. He most likely was in more pain then anyone knew and he did not want to burden anyone...or may have been afraid. Depression and other mental illnesses aren't always found from an outward sign, so do not blame yourself or anyone for not noticing a sign. What's important right now is that you have emotional support from friends and other family members and try and comfort ea other during this difficult time. Sometimes in life we will not find out the answers until we ourselves reach our resting place...and that is really not for us to decide. I am really sorry for your loss and please know there are many out there that understand your pain and  want to embrass you. Take care of yourself and your family right now ok.
Quote:
Originally Posted by honeybee777
I am very emotional, I just found out this morning my father committed suicide. From what the corner says, it wasnt planned it just happened, he had no"regular" signs that they look for, I am confused, he was a happy go lucky fella, good man, an never left a mote, just pulled out the gun and did it, my uncle found him, dead this morning, it makes no sense to no one, we dont know what he did it for, but he did it for some reason, maybe i would feel better if i knew why, but we dont, Im at a loss for word, cant stop crying, I keep vomiting and my anxiety and ptsd is in full gear, what emotions can you expect with this? How do you comfort your siblings when he didnt tell us why, how do you find closer when you dont know wtf he was going through, Im very upset, I have to go through his stuff and legalities of everything, Im worried about my brother he is jail but on the pathway to recovery, what if i telll him and he backslides, how do I tell my children, do i tell them the truth or a lie, very upset feel sad idk what to do
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