As soon as I start to feel sensation of any kind my brain turns off. Half way threw him touching me I think what the hell is goin on. My frekin head lights are on, Go off, Go off. I can't think of a way to say that w/ out using words that I don't know if they are so much allowed here. I hope you get my drift.

As for oral, yeah we try, he tries, and most of the time nothing. The T has suggested drinking wine coolers or something to knock the nervous edge off. I tried and nothing happened. The T said I didn't drink enough then. The equivalent of one beer must no do the trick. Some times it is lack of knowledge on his part, but I don't think it is all his fault. If you can make it happen once, I would think you could make it happen again at another time. It is hit and miss and I thin it is partly because I go away.

I can't make "O" happen if he is watching, or helping. Alone it is not a problem. But with him watching it just is not possible. So it is most likely an issue w/ my brain. If my body is cooperating Why do I stop it. If it is cooperating my brain should leave well enough alone and let the fun begin. My brain will just not cooperate.