Swimmy...I'm so sorry. I'm grieving my current T a bit. I'm on "maintenance." I have not terminated, but I'm doing well. So, I don't need to see T. Still, I miss seeing her. I've seen her most weeks for the last 18 months. Now...I know this is different, but it's still a loss. I can't replace my T; you can't replace your old T.

I am trying to make new friendships and fill my life with others who can add to it differently. Also, I really want to find a new mentor in my life but one that can be a little more of a friend and that is not my therapist. Do you think this is something that you could try too? For instance, I do not know if you or your family are religious, but if so, you could go to youth group at a church or synagogue...etc. I know that I was always quite close to and looked up to and confided in my youth leaders when I was a teen. Now, I'm a youth leader at my church for 6th grade girls. If you are not religious, then maybe a hobby/sport with a coach or leader? I guess I'm thinking something where you can have a more permanent connection with someone that is not your peer.

In the meantime, my T always suggest CARESS: Communicate Alternatively (talk about it with others), Release Endorphins (Exercise!), and Self-Soothe (treat yourself to a milkshake, download a song you like, read, watch a movie, etc.).

Well, that's the best I can offer/suggest. I'm so sorry Swimmy...I truly am. This is hard for me at 30, and your situation is more permanent. Plus, you're younger! I think you're handling it like a champ! It'll get better with time....