Even when I was a kid, we were told we could be anything we wanted to be. We had assemblies every friday where we would sing songs abaout believing in ourselves. It's brainwashing. Then I would come home and my parents devalued everything I was taught in school. I grew up very confused needless to say. I thought it was just me and when I went through things several years ago, it hit me. American society is a lie, a facade. Everything I knew was wrong and I could not be anything I wanted to be because if I could, it would have been done by now. So much would not have been taken away from me like it had been. That was and still is hard to swallow. How can people sleep at night knowing they are consciously lying to children? What's worse, having innocense raped from you as a child still or as an adult? Everything I know is wrong. I must remind myself of this all the time. I have replaced grandiosity with much cynisism about what was, what could have ben, what is, what should never be, what will be, and what will not.