Sometimes I catch myself interrupting my T, too. Up until this point, I've sorta blamed him in my head like, "well, he needs to stop talking cause Im on a roll and its MY therapy!" lol...but I am now wondering if I do it because I don't want to hear him. Maybe it's because I don't always like to hear what he has to say cause its the truth and the truth can hurt...

I'm not sure how to stop it, though. I also think it might be related to my anxiety.

I know for me, when I get a thought in my head now, it's like it just pops out in words no matter who is talking. I remember when I was young, I would just sit there & listen & not say anything while waiting for an opening to say what I was thinking.....as I got more secure with realizing my thoughts are just as important as others I started blurting out my thoughts when I thought them & then I realized that it was many times when someone else was talking. Before it took me to long to formulate a thought to say in my mind....now I have the opposite problem....my mind is so busy forumlating the answer or the thought that it's not always observant as to who is talking around me.

Before my thoughts were so slow, I could hardly be a part of a conversation.....now it's just the opposite....but have to be so careful not to interrupt...using one's wise mind & being aware.

I am an interrupter too, but have improved over the years. It is an obnoxious habit, and I don't want to annoy others, so this has helped motivate me to break this bad habit. Rainbow, since you have had several people tell you that you interrupt, you know you do it. The next step is to become more aware and mindful of when you are doing it. You can pay attention to what you are doing and saying. Even someone who says "umm" all the time can begin to pay attention to that and catch themselves when they do it at least some of the time. Perhaps make little rules for yourself and practice in therapy. "I will not speak until there is a silence of at least 5 seconds." So you will not allow yourself to speak to your T until you have counted 5 blank seconds after she has uttered her last word (for the moment). That would mean she is done speaking and there is a gap into which you can now respond. Or make your own rule that works for you. I think it would be good if you at least made an effort to be aware of your bad habit and interruptions on your own without dumping this all onto T with your idea to have her stop you each time you interrupt her. Take some responsibility and give this a try yourself. You have done so much work on mindfulness, you can be mindful and begin to notice when you are not allowing the other person to finish. You could tell your T at the beginning of your session that you are really going to try to not interrupt her and then perhaps one time, at the end of the session, she can tell you how you did that day. Asking her to correct you every time you mess up sounds like wanting her to be an oversolicitous mother and correct your behavior each time you do something "wrong". You are an adult and you can control your own behavior without the constant corrections and feedback of another person. Try it yourself before giving up and asking your T to play such a dominant role in guiding your behavior. Maybe you won't be perfect at first, and that's OK, but I believe you can start to notice when you are interrupting, and at least show improvement over when you are not being mindful and trying to change. Good luck. It is worth it to break this bad habit!

I think it's great that you were able to hear T and that you want to work on not interrupting her (and, hopefully, people in your RL too)! I think it would be really good progress for you if you could learn to stop interrupting and not only listen to what other people have to say, but really find value in the process of hearing and learning from what others share. This sounds like a great thing to work on in therapy! I think so too. I may have mentioned it in therapy with different Ts, but I didn't really "work on it". Now I want to.

I think interrupting, as a behavior, is indicative of the kind of one-way relationship that you seem to crave (like the therapy relationship). It's a way for you to talk and get gratification from being listened to without having to "give back" by then listening to what the other person has to say. It's a way of taking without giving. I don't do it with the purpose in mind of taking without giving though it seems that way, I realize. I don't think it's possible to have a reciprocal relationship without taking turns talking and listening. I think this is actually a bigger problem in RL than it is in T. In T, the therapy is supposed to be about us. Of course, if we don't listen to what the T has to say, how are we going to make improvements? Perhaps your therapy would be more effective, and you would make progress on your pattern, if you talked less and listened more?
I used to record sessions with my first T. After I listened to the first one, I asked her, "Do I really interrupt you that much?" She said "yes". I didn't know I was doing it, even back then. That's not why I recorded my sessions, but it was a surprise to hear myself. I didn't try to correct it then.
In RL, though, it's not all about us, so interrupting is a real inhibitor to having close relationships. When you interrupt people, you send the message "loud and clear" that you think what you have to say is more important than what they have to say. If you don't listen to someone and ask little follow-up questions about what they're saying, then you're sending them the message that you don't care about them or what is important to them. Have you have the experience of someone interrupting you and not listening to you? How does that make you feel? Even if these things are done unintentionally, they still send the same message.I understand. It IS unintentional, but the effect is the same. You've mentioned before that you struggle with friends and your kids not sharing certain things with you, or not telling you about events in their lives. Maybe if you were a better listener, they would be more inclined to share things with you, and you could have a closer relationship? One-way relationships and one-way sharing can only fill us up part of the way; we need that reciprocality to get the full benefit of a relationship. It actually feels good to listen and give, too! So, maybe, one of the best ways to work on your marriage is to stop talking "at" your husband so much, and really listen to what HE has to say? The best way you can show someone you care is by listening to them and giving them your undivided attention. Why do you think you like your T so much? It's precisely because this is the service she provides. She listens to you! So true! Imagine what kind of an impact you could have on your H, your friends, and your family, if you spent more time really listening to them? It would probably make them feel really good. I know that you've said before that you find the things your H shares "boring," but maybe you need to spend more time listening so that you can learn more about what he is sharing and find something about it that DOES interest you. If you take the time to listen, there are usually things that do grab us. I'm sure we are all boring to our Ts sometimes, too-- but they always find something we say to latch onto. This works in RL too.
I have to try. It's hard.
I can say from experience that having a friend/co-worker who is an interrupter can be very tiring and it makes me feel the need to assert personal boundaries. I'm usually a pretty open book with my friends, but with this friend, I tend not to share very much about my life. Why? For one, I assume she doesn't want to know. Since she always interrupts me to talk about herself, I assume she doesn't really care about what is going on with me or my life. I assume she finds my life boring, since she always cuts me off to talk about herself. Additionally, being interrupted feels like a boundary violation. It feels like she is stepping on me and my boundaries when she talks over me. It makes me feel less safe with her. So, to protect myself, I don't share with her anything "deep" about my life. I don't share my emotions, I don't tell her about my trips, I don't tell her about what's going on with my family, and so forth. I keep things on a superficial level, and tend to do activities with her that don't require too much talking, like going to the movies or exercising. It gets very tiring to be "talked at" so I try to avoid it as much as possible. When someone talks that much and doesn't let me get a word in, it doesn't feel like a conversation or like a meeting of the minds. We are not sharing or connecting. Instead, it feels kind of like a verbal assault. It's the difference between talking "to" or "with" someone, and talking "at" someone. I'm not saying that you necessarily come across as my friend does; I've never had a verbal conversation with you But, if your T, your H, and your friend are pointing this out to you, I think it's a great thing to take note of and I'm proud of you for really wanting to work on it.Thank you. It sounds like a great way to use your therapy time (instead of focusing on T) and a great way to improve your relationships in RL. So, kudos to you for finding a productive way to improve your RL through therapy!

When it's men and women, like maybe at work? I've read that studies show that men are the interrupters.

I used to hate when my t talked. I would think, why is he using up MY time? But over the years, as he has given me more of what I wanted - and as I learned to ask for it - it's more about the product of us. What we are able to accomplish together, rather than him just bearing witness anymore.

ETA: good thread topic!!

Sometimes T says something. Then I go 'that went right over my head', T then says 'your unable to hear that yet'. Not in any judgemental way. But until we're 'there' we either push it away or we're just unable to understand from the part we actually in at that moment.

I think it's great that you're working on not interrupting! I have a habit of doing that sometimes. I didn't used to notice when I did, but now I am more self-aware and catch myself it I do it. My dad is a terrible interrupter, especially when he's drinking. So I know first hand how awful it can feel.

I think that's why T said that to you; she knows you aren't intentionally not listening. My T had a similar difficulty and had me repeat back to her (in my words) what she had just said to me before I could continue on. In other words, I had to acknowledge what she had said. It was hard for me and very artificial/rote but it helped me enormously.

Some excerpts from a fascinating book I'm reading which offers an exercise to consider about our tendency to interrupt:

"Step One - simply notice when you interrupt. Don't stop your interrupting, just notice it.

"Step Two -as you interrupt, silently say this to yourself: 'I'm not letting you fnished your sentence because ________' (and fill in the blank). This will hardly slow you down at all. Just watch, and let the blank fill itself with what you usually hide from yourself in the blur of conversation.
Here are some examples of what various people have discovered:

"I'm not letting you finish your sentence because
.... I already know where you're going, and I have something more clever to say.

....I might forget what I have to say and lose this great opportunity to impress you.

....I already know where you're going, and I want to avoid that territory.

....you aren't interesting enough to distract me from my scary thoughts.

...you're having such a hard time expressing yourself. I'm going to rescue you by saying it better.

...interrupting you is a natural expression of my enthusiasm.

"When you've done this exercise enough times to recognize the top three thoughts that lead you to interrupt, ask yourself if they're true. "[my note - I won't continue here with the advice given]

There is a fascinating exercise called the 'lunch date'

"Make a lunch date with two or more lively friends. When you meet, after your usual greetings, let your friends do all the talking. Let yourself get totally involved with the conversation, but without joining in except to nod, smile, or look concerned when appropriate.

"If they ask you a question, answer briefly. During the conversation, you might say an occasional, 'I hear you', or 'You could be right'. Nothing more.

"Notice the thoughts that would normally cause you to say something. Do you, or does the conversation, seem to suffer when you listen instead of talk?

"Be aware of the contribution you make just by listening. As you leave, make no mention of, or apology for your quiet behavior (did anyone even notice?) and make a date to meet again.

"And experiment in listening is to spend a day listening to people. Just let their words in without superimposing your own thoughts.

"It's amazing to hear what gifts come out of people's mouths when you allow them to complete their thoughts without interruption."

The book is written by Byron Katie and is titled, "I Need Your Love - Is That True? How to Stop Seeking Love, Approval, and Appreciation and Start Finding Them Instead"