I am touched by your words and understand your current state of being. Please know (and I know you know), it will pass - never feels like it will, but it will pass - even if for a short time only.

It is so difficult to maintain that place where we moved forward to, at times, especially when that step was one that came with an unbearable weight (your abuse) with it. That weight is still upon you, not as heavy though, as you have left some of it behind by your willingness to forgive (an incredible fete and a huge leap forward), but it has also shifted (your perception). This, however, can leave one feeling "unbalanced" (the doubts; the pain; the lingering weight), as you so beautifully put it, once landed. I believe anger is only (one of many) an expression of that unbalance.

Your honesty is touching and you are, indeed, helping me! It makes me want to be a better person, too (this coming at a time when I was feeling angry at the world and wanting to give up again).

My heart and my prayers go out to you. And thank you for this post.

Altered State