I couldn't seem to get in this site last night when I really needed to. Although I'm better I really need to get it off my chest...

When I looked in the mirror, I hated myself suddenly. I couldn't look at myself at all. And then I had an image in my head of scratching myself, cutting my skin everywhere. It was terrifying because it was mutilation.

I didn't do that obviously. But I did have to sit on my bed with my blankets piled on top so that I literally couldn't see myself at all. And then I couldn't let any part of my body touch another part of my body. I also had a small break down.

It scared me a lot.....