Wow. I can really relate to you. I know I am disabled. But I still have great hope I will get better with help. What surprised me was I feel so much empathy for YOU, but beat up myself. Thank you for posting. Sounds like a lot of anxiety. Not knowing your background, I'm wondering if you are in therapy/medications? Please stop beating yourself up. Being what society thinks is normal isn't always easy. Sounds like you are a nice person. You are worrying too much about your fiance. I really understand - but I believe it can get better. I also understand the financial hardship, and I hope you will stop punishing yourself. There's always hope.
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Originally Posted by Redsoft
Perna, yeah, I have indeed gone over the numbers with my fiance, but now I just let him take care of them now that we are on the same page, so to speak. I have always been terrible with numbers (get them switched around and all of the above), and they give me anxiety, which is kind of pathetic to say, but it's the truth.
I feel I must be placing blame on myself for the more difficult times we now face - the article you posted (thank you) mentions the type of guilt over doing something hurtful. I suppose that's the kind of guilt I feel, even though I know it's irrational. I was laid off, not fired... It's weird trying to "irrationalize" what I feel is rational (even though deep down know it isn't). Strange cycle.
Thanks, 7cups.
Mapleton, I definitely feel that too, that sense of feeling like you're wasting your gifts. I feel like I have been given great gifts, but that my mental health is getting in the way. It's so defeating. It makes it twice as hard to get started and follow-through with anything.
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