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Old Jun 22, 2013, 02:28 PM
Mapleton Mapleton is offline
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Member Since: Jun 2013
Posts: 247
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Originally Posted by shortandcute View Post
1. It's true that we do need standards. But sometimes we have "skewed" standards because of bad experiences--and those "standards" are often coping skills that we needed to survive but ended up turning into bad habits or defects.
Agreed. The standards I'm thinking of aren't cognitive distortions. They are simply things that other people would take for granted.

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2. Accpetance doesn't mean you just lay down and let a bad situation run you over. There's a saying that goes: "life is tough; as soon as you accept that, it no longer is." That doesn't mean you ignore your problems; but if you accept a situation instead of ignoring or fighting it, you can cope with it much better. For me, it's easier to figure out what to do in a crises when I accpet it instead of fighting it or ignoring it.
Sure you can accept it, rather than fight it, or ignore it. That's kind of tangential to the point though. Accepting takes an active disbelief. I guess the question is... if you knew with absolute certainty that, in combination, a situation would turn out badly... when the constituent parts were summed, would you go ahead with it, and deal with the failure through acceptance, or wouldn't it just make more sense to defect from the situation entirely?

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3. And, no, the past is not always a predictor of the future.
Its true that no individual past act, behavior or situation is an absolute predictor of the future, but (especially) commonly repeated acts, behaviors or situations are the best predictors of the future. The world is not entirely deterministic, but its far more deterministic than chaotic

We know this from anthropology and political science.